Fountain of Youth Review: Guy Ritchie’s Indiana Jones-Style Action Adventure Should Be Renamed as Fountain of Dud

Is John Krasinski the next best thing to play the sardonic Harrison Ford-type adventurer in Fountain of Youth? Or even as charmingly irreverent as Brendan Fraser in The Mummy? Not that Krasinski lacks trying here, and while he does display some good laidback charm in his art thief character Luke Purdue, I can’t help but find him annoying. Especially with how his character is written, like he’s being forced out of a sitcom bubble to lead a so-called larger-than-life, big-budget summer movie tentpole.

But earlier in the movie, I enjoy how casually reckless Krasinski’s Luke Purdue overcomes not one, but plenty of obstacles when some bad guys are desperately trying to get their hands on his tube that carries a precious painting. Guy Ritchie, who’s calling the shots here, directed the elaborate opening scene with a Bangkok-set scooter chase. There’s an animated sense of thrilling entertainment in the action choreography, and at one point, Luke finds himself riding another bike attached to a flaming pushcart.

The excitement keeps on coming, which takes place in the train following Luke’s encounter with a relentless pursuer, Esme (Eiza González, looking feisty as always) and her men. Later, there’s a car chase in the streets of London, where Luke is trying to evade capture while driving a vintage Shelby Cobra. Between the chase, Luke meets his estranged younger sister Charlotte (Natalie Portman), who works as a curator at the British museum. They don’t get along well, and not to mention, hardly seen each other ever since their father’s death. When they finally reunite, they can’t stop bickering at each other like (common) siblings would do.

It’s fun watching the two playing off each other since the Purdue siblings have different personalities, with Luke’s being a sarcastic and pushy brother while Charlotte is the polar opposite, and she’s always frustrating and in disagreement with him. So, what about the story? It’s mainly about Luke’s quest to search for the titular fountain of youth under the employment of a super-rich billionaire, Owen Carver (Domhnall Gleeson). The latter is dying of cancer, and he believes the mythical fountain of youth can heal him.

For an adventure movie like this one, complications are inevitable. There’s Esme, who won’t stop hunting Luke down, and there’s an Interpol inspector named Abbas (Arian Moayed) actively in pursuit as well. If you expect anything new or subversive in the adventure genre, you won’t find it here in Fountain of Youth. It’s as predictable as it gets, but as long as it delivers enough genre know-how entertainment that keeps me occupied, at least the movie is forgivable.

Too bad Fountain of Youth is painfully derivative to the point I feel bored watching this 125-minute adventure movie, which quickly overstays its welcome long before it’s over. The aforementioned earlier part does get off to a promising start, but the rest of the movie feels like a slog. Don’t get me wrong, there are plenty of moving bits and pieces as Luke and his co. globe-trotting in various locations from Bangkok to London, Australia, Italy and Egypt.

And yet, the story is as stale as days-old bread, and even the subsequent major set-piece revolving around the sunken shipwreck misses the mark. There is a curious lack of peril and high-stakes scenarios as the movie progresses, and I never once feel Luke and his sister are in grave danger. It’s more like a walk in the park for them, even with all the running and fighting. By the time the movie trudges through a laborious third act of the eventual fountain of youth discovery, it ends up with an underwhelming whimper.

Fountain of Youth is currently streaming on Apple TV+.